Portraying Loneliness in Film
While the pandemic is thankfully coming to an end and things are slowly getting back to normal, I wanted to discuss one of the fundamental parts of being a human which is the feeling of loneliness. Even though we are able to connect with people once again and the feelings of isolation are over, some people, myself included, might still experience those feelings of loneliness. It is sometimes an inevitable feeling that leaves us tied up with our desire for love, companionship or simply understanding. A universal theme, loneliness is an important aspect in life but it also plays a big part in numerous films, from existentialist arthouse cinema (Ingmar Bergman, Michelangelo Antonioni, et al.) to more commercially minded romances or even comedies (Sleepless in Seattle). Honestly, I think loneliness is inside of all us, at some point in our lives and it is a very common emotion like love but it is something we just don’t talk about. We, as a society, are ashamed of it or it is seen as a weakness but it is an emotion and feeling beautifully portrayed in films. Loneliness is portrayed in a number of different ways in films from people eating or drinking alone, isolating framing devices (characters gazing out of windows is a recurring motif), the use of a diminishing long shot and empty spaces, and they move a little slower with the narrative. They also blur colors more and contain a sharper display of emotion. What makes them so enjoyable, however, is that they are, in essence, an extension of feelings we’ve all had at some point. There’s a tenderness to the acknowledgement that we are all susceptible to loneliness.
I don’t recall the first time I felt loneliness in my life exactly but chances are that it’s been there since childhood (probably even for most people). But it was around middle school when those feelings really started to surface and I found myself relating more to movie characters than those around me and I found more solace and camaraderie within fictional relationships than real ones. And despite how anti-social or even depressing this sounds, it was a comfort in a time in my life where I really needed it. I truly believe a lot of people find sanctuary in film or even books. I know for a lot of cinephiles, films are our coping mechanisms when we are dealing with strife, anger, sadness and loneliness. It can be an escape to a better place or a reflective device on our own internal turmoil. Loneliness, perhaps one of the most universal of these feelings, pervades in a lot of films and is able to amplify these emotions with colors, sounds, focusing and defocusing of the lens which add to creative cinematic effects that further heighten what the viewer may already be feeling.
Now, I’m not going to attempt to answer the question of why we are fundamentally so vulnerable to loneliness—that’s something centuries of literature & decades of films have attempted to uncover and it’s still a work in progress (quite honestly I think it always will be). All of this makes me think of that Orson Welles quote that said “we live alone. We die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create an illusion for the moment that we’re not alone.” What films have to offer, similarly, is merely an illusion that we are going to be okay and that we are not alone in having these feelings. And that is the beauty of films, at least in my opinion.
To be completely honest most films, even some comedies, will infringe upon themes of loneliness at one point or another and some will be more blatant than others. With that in mind, here are my personal top 10 films that understand the lure of loneliness. While films like Cast Away and Gravity are wonderful and truly grasp the aspects of isolation and loneliness, they aren’t included in my Top 10 even though I think they are great films.
Top 10 Films About Loneliness
Honorable Mentions
Silver Linings Playbook (David Russell, 2012)
– Similar to A Ghost Story, this is a film about loss (both of a loved one and of oneself) and the loneliness it causes. While it is harder to see the darker side of loneliness in this film I thought it was perfect in the ways it showcased how loneliness and loss can bring people together.
Shame (Steve McQueen, 2011)
– This is a film that focuses on the loneliness generally associated with some form of addiction. Addiction can be isolating in itself but when you start to layer in the spectrum of human emotion you really start to uncover what it is like to be an addict and the repercussions which is generally in the form of loneliness.
Where the Wild Things Are (Spike Jonze, 2009)
– This 2009 film based of the children’s book, perfectly captures what it feels like to be a kid and have these feelings of loneliness even though you might not know exactly what it is you are feeling just yet.
A Ghost Story (David Lowery, 2017)
– Both a visually striking and intense film, A Ghost Story is a tale of the loneliness of loss. Loneliness and loss are both powerful words and this is a film that captures both aspects of life in a unique way.
10. Taxi Driver (Martin Scorsese, 1976)
Martin Scorsese’s Taxi Driver (1976) is a film driven by loneliness, Travis’s (Robert De Niro) separation from society, his inability to make connections, is highlighted via composition – one of the film’s best known shots sees Travis slowly removed from the frame altogether, as the camera tracks right and away to stare down an empty, stark hallway. Scorsese commented of the shot: “I like it because I sensed that it added to the whole loneliness of the thing.”
9. Into the Wild (Sean Penn, 2007)
Yes, this is a film where the character (and the real-life individual) willing choose to be alone, alone in the wilderness to be exact. But it is truly deeper than that, this 2007 film based on the journey of Christopher McCandless beautifully captures what it is like for someone to grow-up having this sense of loneliness throughout his life and the unfortunate consequences that can cause.
8. Edward Scissorhands (Tim Burton, 1990)
Edward Scissorhands perfectly captures what it feels like to be an outcast and the loneliness outcasts feel. While outcasts don’t usually have knives and scissors for hands, we are still able to see the emotions and feelings that are generally associated with someone who just doesn’t quite fit-in with everyone else and how lonely that can be.
7. Amélie (Jean-Pierre Jeunet, 2001)
Not only is this just a great film overall, it really captures this aspect of a lonely character who desires love, companionship and goodness. While it is one of the more uplifting films on the list, Amélie shows us the kind of comfort we can find in our loneliness but ultimately we need connections and love to truly move forward in life.
6. Chungking Express (Wong Kar-wai, 1994)
Demonstrating that a film about missed connections can also be a truly uplifting cinematic experience, Wong Kar Wai’s Hong Kong set Chungking Express manages to make loneliness and melancholy seem achingly romantic. Two essentially separate stories tell the tales of recently dumped Cop #223 (Takeshi Kaneshiro) and #633 (Tony Leung) and the women they fall in love with in their vulnerable, heartbroken states.
5. Up in the Air (Jason Reitman, 2009)
You might think Up in the Air is an odd pick for a film about loneliness but I think this film truly captures what it is like to get older especially as a ‘bachelor.’ Ryan Bingham (George Clooney) is a guy who loves to travel and work but he hasn’t taken the time to develop meaningful relationship resulting in a sense of loneliness and isolation, however, his feelings about life & work change when he meets Alex Goran (Vera Farmiga).
4. Drive (Nicolas Winding Refn, 2011)
A film that doesn’t even give its main character a real name, is 100% a film about loneliness. Drive follows “The Driver” has he lives and works in LA and seems pretty comfortable with being alone until he meets someone who changes his perspective on everything. Similar to a number of films on this list, Drive shows us the comfort we find in loneliness but once we get a touch of happiness and togetherness we slowly start to realize how important it is to us as humans.
3. Her (Spike Jonze, 2013)
One cannot forget Spike Jonze’s Her which stands alone as a jarring reminder of the tech-obsessed direction our generation is headed to whereby consolation is found more frequently in the virtual realm than in person to person interaction. Hauntingly accurate at points, yet tender at others Her is a masterpiece of a prediction for our futures—of what could happen, and what can be avoided especially when it comes to loneliness and isolation.
2. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (Michel Gondry, 2004)
Another one of my favorite films (clearly I have a theme here…) shows us the loneliness we can experience even when we are in a relationship. While we only get a glimpse of this we can see that Clementine (Kate Winslet) makes the choice to erase her memories of the relationship she had with Joel (Jim Carrey) as a result of her loneliness. On the other side, we see Joel who has experience this sense of isolation and loneliness a lot of his life find comfort in Clementine.
1. Lost in Translation (Sofia Coppola, 2003)
Of course, my number 1 pick is one of my favorite movies and really resonates with me on a deep level when it comes to capturing the emotion and feelings of loneliness. Charlotte (Scarlett Johansson) in Lost in Translation is not only linguistically lost as she traverses Japan, she is both lost within herself and her relatively new relationship—all these, heightened by the cultural barrier between her and the Japanese. The layers of miscommunication translate to loneliness for her, stuck in a luxuriously sterile hotel room with no one to explore the city with. This is until she meets Bill Murray’s character, Bob, who offers her temporary relief from her solitude. A beautifully subtle take on loneliness, Sofia Coppola’s Lost in Translation one of my favorite films.
The Fade Out: A Movie Blog 